Insanity Is In The Eye Of The Beholder
So once again I find myself typing an inactivity post… This time however, is a bit more interesting. The typical reasons of school, work and simply not having enough time was my explanation for not blogging previously. Now, well, I don’t know. I actually don’t know.
I’ve had plenty of time and even sat and stared blankly into the empty space of word-press for hours wondering why I didn’t just start typing away. Some may jump and think it’s writers block but this couldn’t be further from the truth. I have tons of content readily available to flow from my mind and onto the screen. No, it’s not that. My problem is I can’t figure out why I’ve lost the desire to do a lot of the things I like, including blogging.
You ever experience something like that? It’s hard to say, but its comparable to depression in some regards. I feel fine, and am quite happy, it’s just the inability to explain lack of desire which is bothersome. It hasn’t just been with writing. This phase also included playing sports I’ve loved all my life like basketball. The reason I used to play well was because of it always being a game I found fun. During this dry spell, it didn’t feel like a game anymore. It was like just going through the motions and just doing it for the sake of doing.
This is probably the most random post I will have ever written on here, but one that had to be made. I need this as a reminder that if this phase happens to come back, I know I was able to break free from it and return to being normal. This was a very difficult phase to get by. Nothing pains me more than having time be wasted, especially since I’m 21. I’ve always remained a little kid at heart and truly miss the carefree nature and genuine fun I had when I was younger. The thoughts of responsibility and the future are really bearing their weight on me. What helped bring my head back was realizing every day is an opportunity to get something done. If you start thinking that something is holding you back, it will. You have to believe you have control.
Another thing that helped me was the revival of my confidence. You never truly can appreciate how important confidence is until you lose it. It really is like magic. Confidence allows your body and mind to achieve things that would never be possible without it. It sounds really cheesy and cliche but seriously, take the time to believe in yourself and your life will be better off in so many ways. I can’t explain how many things have turned around for me since I gained back some of my confidence.
Anyway, so from here on out, I am going to try my best to get back on my grind and make this blog what I wanted it to be when I created it. It will be the platform for my thoughts, advice, information hub and hopefully the portfolio of work that will get my career going.